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Review: We have addressed the first four of the 10 Commandments which focus on the relationship between God and us.  He is God and there is no other…We are to not to create or make anything out to be God other than him…We are to revere his name and never profane it…We are to take a day of rest that is mindful of Him. 

Today we speak to the 5^th Commandment that serves as the first of the commands that direct our relationship to others.  Truly you can sum up the Law and the Prophets by saying that we are to Love God with all our being, and we are to love others to the fullest.  These 10 Commandments reflect the truth of loving God and loving others.

Read Exodus 20:1-12

Honor (def.)- it is a weighty valuing or respecting of someone. It is to “value and prize them highly”. BKC

Matthew Henry gave a summary of how honor is practiced:

• Esteem them in your conduct.
  • We are to speak of them well.
  • Our spirit towards them is to be encouraging to them.
• Obedience to lawful commands.
  • Our parents are flawed, and we are not bound to obey a command that is unrighteous or unlawful.
• Come when they call.
  • Changes as we go into adulthood but maintains the willingness to come.
• Go where they send you.
  • Changes as we go into adulthood, but serious consideration should be taken of such directives.
• Do what they bid you.
  • Compliance
• Refrain from what they forbid you.
  • A must as a child, but as an adult seek to understand the wisdom as to why.
• Submission to their counsels and corrections.
  • They have lived life longer and have learned more. So even as an adult wisdom would receive counsel and correction from those who love you most.

Promise Offered

• Such a practice of a nation will cause it to endure.
  
  
• It is not a promise of long life, although it certainly helps, but a promise that such a culture will be built with durable strength.

“Society cannot be maintained in its integrity if we cannot honor those set over us by God’s ordinance as reverently honored.” Calvin

• Parental authority that is honored shows wisdom of living and is “glorifying” to God as the one who establishes who has authority.
  
  
• Deuteronomy 5:16 says that things will go well for you when you honor your parents.

New Testament continues to affirm the commitment to honor parents.

Ephesians 6:1-2 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ² “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—³ “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”

Colossians 3:20 “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.”

What about the bad parent? Do I honor them?

• Obedience to unrighteousness is not expected.
  • Example: King Saul with Jonathan. 1 Samuel 20

• Respect for the role and the person can only help make right that which is wrong vs. retaliation for that which has harmed you.
  • This is not a directive to subject oneself to abuse.
  • It keeps your heart from becoming calloused towards authority.
  • It keeps a posture of hope to see heart change.
  • Example: Jacob and Laban. Genesis 29-31
  • David continued to respect his Father-in-Law despite the malicious actions of Saul because he acknowledged the God-assigned authority King Saul carried. He did not allow himself to be abused, but he always acted with honor.

When do I need to stop obeying them?

• It is most clearly so when we marry. “Leave and cleave.” Genesis 2:24
  
  
• When you are no longer under their roof and have become independent.
  • Respect and honor remain.
  • Counsel and receiving correction are still wise to receive from our parents as adult to adult. Solomon speaks to the fool who spurns his father’s correction.  Proverbs 15:5
  • Moses responded to the wisdom of his father-in-law at an old age. Exodus 18

What about honoring parents as they age?

• We are called to care for them as repayment for their care of us.
  1 Timothy 5:4 “But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.”
  • This is a true working out of our faith.
  • We provide care for them that they no longer can do for themselves.
  • This care can be difficult if we feel we were not cared for well.
• Parents are to avoid burdening their children financially in that care.
  2 Corinthians 12:14b “…After all, children should not have to save up for their parents, but parents for their children.” 
  • The Bible regularly presumes an inheritance is being provided to the children.
  • Things happen where we might need to help financially, but this ought to be the exception.

Take aways

1. Honoring your parents glorifies God and grows your relationship with him.
   
   
2. Honoring your parents, regardless of how healthy they are, will help you navigate relationships with greater strength and wisdom.
   
   
3. Honoring your parents is a lifelong journey that can teach you much.